By Heather
Some memories just stick with you. Some have no significance at all but you remember them. This particular one is just special to me because it was something out of the ordinary. When I was a kid, I'd say around fourteen maybe fifteen years old it was just me, my brother BG and my dad. My mom was off at SRD. SRD is something that members of TOPS weight loss group go to. It lasts about three to four days so in that time it was just us three. Now I love my mother more than I can put into words but at this time she was going through the beginnings of menopause and she was for lack of a better term (crazy). Not "I'm gonna kill you and rip off your face crazy" but still not herself. She would fly off the handle if you dropped a can of beans.
But while she was away during these times there was no cooking in the house, there was just eating out. Maybe one morning one of us would be ambitions enough to pour a bowl of cereal or make a piece of toast. So on Sunday was when we would go somewhere nice after church and this time around it was a restaurant in the mall. This place the meals were so big that they looked like as soon as you took a bite it grew back. Now my dad is a comfortable home body and if he's not at church or out for dinner on Sunday he's at home passed out asleep in his sleep shorts in the recliner. But for some reason this Sunday after dinner he said lets take a walk around the mall. So we all started walking together, I held my dad and my brother's hands as we walked because its not all the time we get to spend a day together so I took those moments when I could get them and just enjoy it. We walked into a Game Stop and my brother and me are gamers so we looked at the new titles that were out and some of the older classics that we didn't yet have but have played. Now usually anything over twenty five dollars if me or my brother wanted it we'd have to earn the money to buy it ourselves so this was a surprise when dad said go ahead and get what you want. I don't remember what my brother got but I got my own copy of Lunar SSSC for PlayStation. It was something so simple but it wasn't something that he normally did and it was just something very nice and sweet that he did. He also stopped off at the Dairy Owl on the way home and bought all of us ice cream. It was just such a good day. Now every time I think of a game to play just to play I always grab that game. Yeah the storyline is predictable and often corny but I love that game because it is a nice feel good game.
And that is my fond memory for this post.
I love you dad.
By Heather
Yes, the quest to lose weight. Or, as I like to phrase it, putting operation "Stop being so fat" in to action. Me and my husband need to lose weight. We got married almost a year ago and started working, working, working, working, working and we got into this routine that is a slow spiral into unhealthy weight gain and health problems for the both of us. So there are a few things that I have going for me to get my ass in gear. Number one, my husband. He also needs a kick in the pants to get started and I'm the boot. So if I have to be the boot I have to be motivated. Number two, yes I am incredibly bitter about my job but that doesn't mean I'm not good at what I do. At my job the human resources lady came up to me with this request. Its all volunteer basis but the store needed a wellness champion leader because of this competition between stores that is coming up. Now you say I can do this on my own, that I can be motivated on my own? Possibly, but if you want a guarentee? Give me a responsibility to uphold and lead by example, well then I have to. I don't shirk off responsibility and now I am completely motivated to get Ryan and I down at least thirty pounds by October when he has his surgery. So for husband and work, operation "Stop being so fat" is a go.
So this:
Will hopefully turn into this:
Aren't I beautiful?
By Heather
#1 Impatient Customers
This is actually something I love/hate. I love it when customers make angry sounds. As if some how making these sounds is going to make me give a shit about you more than the person I'm currently waiting on. Or a customer that somehow wedges his merchandise ahead of some old woman's singular item and I some how won't notice. I'm sorry, I don't reward rude people. Especially when this sweet woman is just trying to by her birdseed for the week.
#2 Customers Ignoring Me
I hate it when a customer blatantly ignores me while I'm simply trying to ring them out. "Hello sir, did you find everything you needed?" .....nothing...."Alright your total is $58.34, will this be on debit or credit?" ....nothing...."Thank you sir, you have a good day." ...nothing...
Another example, and I hate this. Do Not, under any circumstances do this. If you're one of those customers that gets on the phone and talks to your friends your entire visit to the store this is for you. By the time you get to the checkout line do not look at the cashier, snap your fingers and point to your cart, expecting us to sort through your shit to ring it all up and then once I've rung it all up you get all pissed off at me when I tell you what to do with the pinpad because you're to much of a retard to read it.
Another example. When you ask me where something is in the store, please I ask you, stick around to hear the answer. Trust me, I know exactly where it is. When you ask me and then keep walking, don't complain to me when you can't find it. Cause why? Your a fricken idiot who can't stand around for one minute for me to give you exact, easy to follow directions.
#3 Cart Preparation
Customers that load their cart like a retard. (I do not mean retard as in my mentally handicapped cousin, because he has more smarts than to do this) This is pretty much self explanatory but I will give an example. If you know you're going to be getting something very heavy/awkward, get the appropriate cart for it or even if you don't, load your cart accordingly. I've had a customer load their cart full of the smallest pieces of hardware they could find, then on top of that a shit ton of shelving, mouldings, and five pieces of plywood. On top of that, the asshole didn't even help me get everything down. Looked at me as if somehow I had the problem. Quickest way to ruin my day when you make your stupidity my issue.
#4 Co-workers
Store associates that make your job harder because of the own incompetence.
Prime example right here, this just happened this weekend. I'm not going to use actual names so I'm going to use the name George. Saturday night George comes up to me and tells that they may be late to work the next day because they are picking up a family member at the hospital. Its fine, family takes priority over work. I asked George if he was sure he was going to be able to come in at all on Sunday because if there was a doubt it would be easier for me to call someone in to fill their shift now instead of later. After many times George assured me that he was going to be at work because he was closing. I said it was fine, just to call and keep me updated as to when he would be in. The next day comes along, not only does George not call, I try calling him four times finally get a hold of him, he tells me he just got his son home from the hospital, he was going out to get prescriptions, shower and he said he'd be in at four. I asked again, are you sure you don't want to call off? Are you sure you'll be here by four because that's what I'm going to write down. He assured me he was going to be there at four. So I put his time down. 3:50pm rolls around, George calls and says he can't come in. Ten minutes before his fricken shift starts the asshole calls off. So now the closing head cashier is screwed because George did not have the foresight to call even an hour ahead to warn me. Thank you George for being a useless bagpipe.
#5 Sweaty Pocket/Boob Money
Yes, you heard me correctly. I hate it when a guy pulls a clump of money out of his back pocket and plops it in my hand. Yes sir, of course I want your swass in my hand. I watched this one couple for two hours run around building materials gathering their stuff. When they came up their order came up over four hundred dollars. This busty woman pulls a wad of sweaty money out from under her boob and shoves it in my hand. I shit you not I could have squeezed this money and sweat would have poured out of it. And all I can think of other than the "Oh my God she really just did that" was "Thank you...thank you lady, because I've always wanted hepatitis." I couldn't even hide the look of disgust on my face. After they left I couldn't Lysol my hands enough. I didn't have hand sanitizer, I grabbed the closed thing I could and just had my good friend/co-worker spray my hands down.
By Heather
I know that from my first post I gave the impression that retail, no matter what, is always a steaming pile of crap. But on the contrary my friends, there is, for however brief it may be, a good day. I came into work today with the same sunny disposition that I normally have and every customer I had was incredibly fantastic, happy, and I was able to joke with them. It was all around a good day. And to top it off I caught a guy trying to steal over a thousand dollars worth of merchandise. (those of you doubting the dollar amount keep in mind I work at a large hardware superstore, its not a difficult feet to accomplish.) So that always makes me happy catching stupid people doing stupid things.
But on the lighter side today rocked even though I closed the store today and have to be there tomorrow for morning at 5am. These days are rare so those of you in retail, respect them, and love them. Because you know the very next day your gonna get the very same lady arguing for you to give her ten percent off not because the product is damaged or she has a coupon, nope, she just wants it for the hell of it.
By Heather
Alright, first post!
As I said in the blog description I've started this blog to get out my frustrations about working retail and the idiots that shop at the store. And to this people would answer, "Then do something else beside bitch and complain about your life." Aw touche my friend, getting a job anywhere but retail is hard. I have been and am still trying to get out of this endless rage spiral.
But onto the jubilation. Today, as this happens many days, is one the biggest ticks I have about people that come into the store. When I am finished ringing out their merchandise and tell them their total they walk over to the pinpad (where you swipe your card) and as usual like 95% of customers don't read the screen I go into my usual speech. I'll demonstrate.
Me: "Swipe your card and hit yes to verify your total"
Customer: ...
From here on out the customer stares at the pinpad as if willing it to tell him the meaning of the universe. Their pupils dilate as a steady stream of drool flows down their chin and I'm sure they at some point get a lazy eye and a tumor growing from the side of their head before they look up.
Customer: What do I do?
At this point I have five people in line waiting for your ass to stop being retarded. But I keep my composure because I have to, or else I would be taking your card and doing it for you because I'm so exasperated to do even the slightest task. What I have just told you to do is exactly what it asks of you on the pinpad screen.
Me: "Press the yes button sir."
The customer does it with as much force as he can with either his finger or the pen.
Me: "Is this on your debit or credit?"
His eyes yet again focus on the screen as if the longer he stares at it it will answer every question he has ever had in his life. I can actually hear your thoughts. "What is this alien piece of technology, how does it work, what does it mean. I want to know, tell me magical box! I must know!" And just before I implode he looks up at me for that magical answer.
Me: "...debit or credit."
Customer: Oh...I don't...remember my pin.
Me: That's okay, just hit the cancel button, it will take you to credit.
Customer: But I want to buy my stuff, I don't want to cancel.
Me: It won't cancel out the sale, it will just take you to the credit screen.
Customer: ....
Me: ....
Customer stares at me blankly.
I can hear the teapot whistling inside my brain.
Customer: ...I don't understand...
I finally take it upon myself to push the cancel button for them and enjoy the 2.5 seconds of watching the customer freak out as their receipt prints out and I had it to them.
Me: Have a good day sir.
Customer confused but satisfied leaves but comes back about a half hour later because he ended up forgetting half his merchandise in another bag at my counter. I hate having to spoon feed grown adults.
This happened about seven times today. Now people that have ever worked retail for any period of time know that it is completely different working it that just being a normal consumer. I hope this has been education to those of you who haven't.
